Men and Women: Post Breakup Texts and Phone Calls

9:16:00 PM

So, for those of you who have experience with the whole seriously ridiculous in between period of a nasty breakup you know how funny people can be. I personally love and always expect the three month post breakup call and/or text message. The text is always something like, "hey. what's up" (yes no caps and no question mark). After three months and a mutual understanding you needed to be out of each others lives, this message will almost certainly piss you off or make you laugh. You have the choice to respond because of two things: one being that you still have feelings for the sender, or you're just a sadomasochist and can't wait to hear what their explanation is for even thinking to contact you again. I'm curious as hell. 




The phone call is even better because your disbelief and utter annoyance that the person even dare keep your number comes straight through when you find out who it is on the other end. Men are quite funny when it comes to this phone call because they begin the conversation in happy tones and ask stupid questions as though nothing has ever happened in the past. What in the hell is wrong with you? Idiot. You remind the person that you are now broken up and have been for the last few months and cannot believe they remember none of their previous assholic behavior. When he says he has missed you and has been with no one else and now has more time and energy to put into your relationship, you should guffaw and tell him you could give two hearty shits about his feelings. Firstly, because where the hell were they when he acted like a total child and decided his time was worth more than yours. Hello! You have shit to do too and invested time into your relationship previously even though you had less than he. Good freaking riddance you imbecilic douche canoe. I personally love love loved this because oh yes now that you want to make time for the other person we are supposed to take you back and thank our lucky stars. Yeah effin right yo. 



Delusion. Men are fantastically wonderful about this and never have a clue as to why it's insane to think that you would deal with this kind of behavior. To allow someone to  treat you the way they wish when it's convenient for them is just the kind of relationship you have been scouring the seven seas for right? Mhmm. I am forever amazed that men pull this card when it comes to a confident and smart person who has respect for themselves. They obviously didn't pay attention to the person they were dating because if they did they would know this option is off the table and to lower yourself by giving a second and third chance it just plain stupidity. Once a moron, always a moron. 

I'm not saying women can't be stupid because we have all met these dummy broads too but men have a keep ability to ignore past events like you will just magically forget along with them. No sir, I think not. Get thee to a psych ward and evaluate that shit. Dating these days is just a shit sandwich factory. There are great people out there that will treat others with respect but people like this has seriously ruined things. If you're the caller in this story then do yourself a favor and remember that your shit has a unique smell and we know the difference. Before you screw up, think and make sure that you understand if you make rash decisions because you're too immature you are most likely going to ruin it and the relationship is over. No take backs man. 

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