Settling just to settle?

9:46:00 AM

Butterfly tummy syndrome.

 The dating world is as difficult as all hell these days and opportunities are few and far between for catching anything interesting, at least for me. Men and women everywhere are getting into the habit of serial dating; some people seem to change their significant other like they change their underwear. Are we all that scared of being alone that we’ll take anything and anyone?

I recently went out with a couple men and didn’t find that a second date was needed considering that we had nothing in common. Having things in common is important to me and why waste their time if I would become a place holder for them. A couple friends of mine say that I am too selective because of this quick to end it trigger finger I have, but isn’t it worse to drag it on if you know from the beginning it’s not going to work? Being selective isn’t a crime. Settling to me seems like the worst thing to be done about the whole deal.

Settling down, down being the operative word, is something more abhorrent than settling. There is a distinction in my mind, settling is something where maybe you find a few things here and there that you like about the person and think this is good and I can’t expect perfection, and maybe that works; settling down on the other hand is when the person chosen for you has nothing of what you’re looking for in a mate but they’re there so… why the hell not, I don’t want to be alone. That syndrome is not a solution to the problem of loneliness but on the contrary only another problem you’ll be adding to the stack.

But we all want the butterflies so why not wait till those come along? I’m guilty of that thought and I think it still exists whether you believe it or not. Some friends have told me that’s what they waited for and found it with someone they were dating, took a long time but it was worth the wait. I know what you’re thinking, I used to get those in middle school, but maybe we just haven’t met the right person to do the job. I won’t say the right one because contrary to popular belief I think there is more than one right person for everyone.

So if you’re settling just to settle and end up miserable, than it’s a sad thing for you and of course the person you’re settling for. If not, good luck to you and let the game begin!

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